WE LIVE....WE LOVE....


We knew that living over here would hold challenges that we could not possibly foresee or plan for. We were right.

When we would come on short term mission trips we would always make a connection with certain people and year after year we would look for them and reconnect. Even after it had been months it seemed as if we would just pick up where we left off.

It was always hard for us to leave; more tears have been shed in the Honduras airport than Kleenex could make tissues for.

Well as time has passed our heart strings have been bound tighter and tighter to our friends, many of them are now in the category of family. We share our joys and our heart aches, we celebrate birthdays and births we have cried and held one another in times of sorrow and death. We live, and we love. It is the little everyday things; the little one is now potty trained! Oh no chicken pox! The water line is broken, it is necessary to carry the water up the mountain, grubby little fists thrusting weeds into my hand with the pride of having found beautiful flowers for Melissa. Look at my new shoes, I dropped my sucker, I lost my job because they found out I am pregnant. I'm pregnant! I need a ride! The baby is coming! She is here; Oh no I have a yucky little sister. I have a new dog, it has six puppies. I like my puppies more than my new sister. I love my family; my family is driving me crazy. Church was great today. I missed my friend there today, I was glad to see her back. The children singing loud and strong, me stumbling through the songs. Using new markers, writing on your neighbor with the new markers. CUPCAKES, messy faces covered in sugar, dirty faces offering sugar. Running feet and running noses. It is all part of living life. It is not all glamorous even though I do feel like a star with little ones running and calling my name just to say hello. It is just living and we are so blessed to be able to live this life.

There is great joy to be had in the day to day living; there is also a great opportunity for pain. We recently found out that some children that we are very close to might be moving hours away. We were devastated, these are our children, and we see them every day. We hold them, we chase them, we kiss them, wipe their tears, discipline them. We feed them, we clothe them, and we laugh and cry with them. They are a part of our heart. It was doubly hard on me that my daughter Katrina is just heart broken,

She burst into tears, sobs wrenched from her heart as the news that she might lose some of these children that are a huge part of her life. I had to watch my baby ache for these children whom she loves; this was not a price I had thought to pay. But pay we will for when you have a heart as Katrina does, one that is open and loving, one that embraces all of the love offered to her and returns it honestly and open there is a potential for great pain.

I would not change Katrina's heart for the world, I know that with great love comes great rewards; she loves and is loved in return. If she did not love so deeply I know that she would not hurt as deeply. Would I wish her no pain? Of course I would. I would love to wrap a blanket of protection around my child. But at what price no pain? Would that mean that she would not experience any love? How could I wish that on my child? I know that we will deal with the pain that is part of this life with the help of our Father in heaven. And we know that one beautiful day we will no longer have to be separated and feel the pain of not being with those we love. I wonder if our Father feels that way. I wonder that when we chose to live our lives separated from his love if he feels the pain that we feel? I wonder why he doesn't wrap a blanket of protection around us protecting us from the pain and sorrow of this world. Would that mean we wouldn't get to experience great love? How could he wish that on his child anymore than I could? Do I want to experience pain? Well no. But I do want to experience great love and joy.

If you ever have the chance to put yourself out, to open your heart to someone, never let the risk of pain stand in your way. Look at the great love Jesus opened himself up to and at what a price.